This entry of Goosebumps is a bit more whacky than any other entry I’ve read so far, for multiple reasons. However, this is one of those entries that leaves me scratching my head asking why? Also, you can’t scare me R. L. Stine, especially in this entry.

Synopsis:

Eddie and his best friend are on a field trip to Greene Forest (these names, wow). His friend is named Herbie but goes by Hat. Hat is known for wearing a hat (who would have thought) and finds the peak of comedy to push, shove, and slap other people. I think Hat is Fred Durst.

The book has a ton of characters, all introduced across a few pages including Courtney, Denise, Eddie, Hat, Charlene, and Molly. This list doesn’t even include every character, which is insane, it’s character overload.

The group is on a field trip to Greene Forest and it’s raining, great. Eddie and Hat are exploring when they’re jump scared by a snake on the ground. Courtney sees this and picks up the snake beginning her Lord Voldemort arc.

Eddie is then teased by his friends for being scared of a snake. Great friends.

On the way back to the bus everyone is gathered around Courtney. Courtney is playing with bumblebees, sure. She proceeds to throw the bees at Eddie, this is uncool and illogical, I think the bees would just fly away or sting the person throwing them.

Anyways, this doesn’t happen as Eddie and Hat are attacked by bees, wow, this is truly fantastic. Also, why is Courtney doing this? Obligatory, “Oh no, not the bees, aaaaagh” reference.

Eddie is then bullied on the bus ride back to the school. Cool, so nothing happens to Courtney for throwing bees at another student with a ton of witnesses, but Eddie gets bullied for being assaulted.

According to Eddie, Courtney isn’t scared of anything. This means in a real horror novel or horror movie, Courtney wouldn’t make it past the first five minutes, since she’d likely be the one to go investigate.

The group of friends discuss ways to scare Courtney. This group includes Hat, Eddie, Molly, and Charlene. Eddie considers maybe a mud monster costume would scare her.

However, Molly must be the most intelligent of the group since she suggests using a rubber snake to scare Courtney. We already know she’s not scared of snakes, but sure.

The next day, they put the rubber snake in Courtney’s lunch. This is around the time we learn Courtney brings two lunches with her every day, why?

The second lunch becomes important since during lunch time Mr. Melvin, the teacher, forgot his lunch. Courtney gives him her lunch without pulling out her part of the lunch, so Mr. Melvin gets scared by the fake snake.

I have to wonder if Courtney expected Mr. Melvin to eat her whole lunch, but I’d lean closer to plot convenience.

Courtney sees the fake snake, takes it, and stomps it to death.

After school, following the failed attempt to scare Courtney, Eddie and Hat run into Mrs. Rudolph. Her cat is stuck in a tree. Eddie refuses to climb the tree to get the cat, I would do the same, ain’t no way I’m doing that.

Courtney shows up (of course) and since she’s not afraid of anything climbs up the tree to save the cat. She succeeds. This causes Eddie to really want to scare her.

The next attempt to scare her is by using a tarantula from the school. After school on one of the following days, Eddie and Hat sneak into Mr. Dollinger’s room to steal a tarantula.

As Eddie and Hat get the tarantula into the jar, they hear footsteps. They hide in a cabinet. The only problem, when they try to leave the door of the cabinet won’t open. To make matters worse, the tarantula has escaped. Eddie freaks out and breaks the door open, he must be very strong.

Hat is able to recapture the tarantula.

The next morning, in the gym Eddie and Hat are on the balcony in the gym. Eddie waits until Molly and Charlene are able to get Courtney over to their side of the gym.

Hat drops the tarantula from the second story, which misses and falls on Molly. Molly freaks out, but Courtney isn’t scared and picks up the tarantula.

Due to the freak out of Molly, Mr. Russo, the gym teacher is able to catch Eddie and Hat, who face minor punishment.

At home, later in the day Eddie’s brother Kevin is wearing a mud monster costume. Kevin is making a mud monster film. He proceeds to get mud everywhere because the costume is covered in actual mud. This sounds like both a mess and really dumb.

Eddie tells Kevin about Courtney. Kevin suggests scaring her with a dog. If spiders, snakes, and bees don’t scare her, I don’t think a dog will do much. Eddie thinks this is a genius idea, so what do I know?

The next day, the group gets together. Charlene suggests using her dog Buttercup. Her dog is a big Saint Bernard whose harmless but really hates whistling. So, are they going to convince Courtney to whistle or try to find a scarier dog? No.

The actual plan is to lure Courtney to a treehouse in the woods and then one of them to whistle. This is a horrible plan.

Molly fakes her voice to sound like Denise and calls Courtney, only problem is Courtney is with Denise, this doesn’t work.

It then rains for approximately a week. There’s a ton of rain in this book and the setting is Southern California, which I don’t think it usually rains like that in Southern California.

A week later they plan to scare Courtney in the woods. They hear Courtney and Denise in the woods. The group applies shaving cream to Buttercup to make the dog look rabid.

However, Buttercup chases after a squirrel and the plan is ruined. They go searching after the dog.

On the search Eddie runs into a different dog. This dog is scary, but Hat scares the dog off to save Eddie. Turns out it’s Courtney’s dog (who would have guessed?) and she’s also found Buttercup.

Days later, the group of Eddie, Hat, Molly, and Charlene are thinking of a new plan to scare Courtney. At this point, is it even worth it? Eventually, Eddie comes up with a well formulated and considered plan, we’ll scare her at night. Genius.

At school the next day, Courtney is talking about mythological monsters. Turns out Courtney believes these monsters are real. This must be setting up something.

Later, Eddie asks Kevin to scare Courtney with his mud monster costume. Keven refuses. They eventually make a deal where Kevin will scare her if Eddie does his chores for a month. This doesn’t seem like a good deal.

The next night, Kevin is dressed and ready to scare Courtney. Kevin is also going to have his friends help him by dressing up as mud monsters as well.

Molly convinces Courtney to come to the woods by telling her the mud monsters will be there tonight.

Later at night, everyone is in the woods. Eddie and the rest of the group are hiding. Courtney and Denise are in the treehouse with binoculars, which I don’t think those will be too effective at night, unless they have night vision.

The only issue, Kevin and his friends are nowhere to be seen.

Eventually the mud monsters start to show up, but Courtney is looking in the wrong direction. Then Kevin and his friends in costume show up on the other side of the woods. Soon dozens of mud monsters can be seen.

As a note, the mud monsters make their first appearance on page 115, over 95% of the way through the book.

Courtney and Denise finally see the monsters. They start screaming, then everyone starts screaming. I can’t wait to see what happens next.

Two weeks later, so R. L. Stine finally gets to an interesting part of the book and says, we’re skipping two weeks. Great, this is lame.

Courtney brags about proving monsters are real, since she saw them, but she doesn’t have any proof, so she hasn’t proved anything. According to Eddie she’s been worse than ever, which I don’t even want to know how bad that is.

The book ends with Eddie not wanting to scare Courtney anymore, but I think you succeeded in scaring her, even if it was for just a few seconds.

Review:

Nothing happens.

I don’t know what to say about this book. I think I’ll try to start with all of the problems.

There are too many characters, so none get developed, Courtney doesn’t have any type of meaningful comeuppance, the book doesn’t really have monsters, the story is boring, and the plot is super weak.

I think the idea of mud monsters are cool. They technically get some back story, for a single chapter, and I skipped over it in the synopsis, since it’s so unimportant. Courtney works as a villain. That’s about it.

I think in most ways, this is the weakest Goosebumps book so far.

I’ll give this Goosebumps entry an astounding 3/10. That might even be a bit generous.

Twist ending:

Mud monsters are real, Courtney becomes even worse. How does she become worse, I don’t know.

Memorable line:

“You both have fleas.” They do not, in fact, have fleas.

Memorable moment, cliffhanger, etc:

Mud monsters arrive. They stick around for about two pages. Two pages!

Bad parenting:

What parents? There are none. However, if you include teachers, Courtney is not punished for throwing bees at other children. Absolute menace II society.

Random References:

Coke, Snow White and the Seven Dwarves, Superwoman, and Dopey. I’d describe this book as less dopey and more sleepy.

Tropes in book:

Sibling pair, pranks, fake animal abuse, snake jump scare, crazy cliffhanger, and I might as well add it in, a character has a dumb nickname, I’m referring to Hat. At least there could have been some alliteration with Hat Herbie.

TV tie-in:

The episode is dumber than the book.

This Goosebumps episode tries to be a comedy. It doesn’t work. The only positive is the mud monster is in the episode more. That’s it.

The episode plays out much like the book, just a lot worse. If you ignore the bad acting, you have no field trip, the woods are barely in the episode, and most of the attempts to scare Courtney are removed.

They at least reduce the character count. The main characters are now just Hat, Eddie, and Courtney. Courtney does have an unnamed friend, who does nothing in the episode. Otherwise, the number of good changes are almost non-existent.

The ending is also worse with Courtney talking the mud monster to death, yes, there’s only one mud monster and she talks it to death. Then it rains and it’s alive. Courtney is then called by the president and becomes a celebrity. My head hurts, I am unimpressed, I am so happy this torture experiment invented by R. L. Stine is over. I hope the next book is better.

This Goosebumps episode also gets a 3/10. I feel like the mud monster “Oooooorgh.” (that’s the sound it makes).

Memorable episode line:

“Smoked Salmon? I can’t say no to that.” The teacher proceeds to take a child’s lunch. Children don’t need food, only teachers need food.

Bonus!!!

“Grandpa will go in to get your ball for you.” Grandpa proceeds to die in the third person.” Yes, they kill an elderly man in this episode, crazy for a Goosebumps episode.

Famous cast:

Charlotte Sullivan and Martin Roach.

Come back soon for more Goosebumps fun and reviews.

To read the last Goosebumps review: https://goosebumpsblogger.com/goosebumps-14-the-werewolf-of-fever-swamp/

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